Have I told you lately that I HATE this song?

The radio station they play in the caf and kitchen (where I work five days a week) has played "Have I Told You Lately That I Love You?" three out of the last four days I've worked, during my shift. I've also heard it at least twice on the same station when I'm NOT working. It's a truly awful song. The version they're playing is Rod Stewart's, and while I don't know if that's the original or a cover, it's simply not good. The vocals are breathy and bland, and the lyrics themselves are insipid. I mean, it rhymes "gladness" with "sadness." Somebody please, get the man a thesaurus!

Keeping in the same vein here, they've also been repeatedly playing Cher's cover of "It's in His Kiss (the Shoop Shoop Song)," (popularized in the sixties by one Betty Everett), as well as a decidedly horrid remake of CCR's "Have You Ever Seen the Rain." I'm not sure who does it, but it's some guy with a weird, kinda raspy voice. A quick Google search reveals that many people have done covers of this song, Rod Stewart among them. It could well be him; I have no idea.

Now don't get me wrong—I'm all for a good cover. It's a win-win situation: the original artist gets some fees (or at least a possible boost in popularity), the new artist gets some publicity with a song that's already known and liked, and the public gets a fresh perspective on an old song. Some recent acceptable covers would include the Goo Goo Dolls' catchy take on Supertramp's "Give a Little Bit" and Uncle Kracker's remake of Dobie Gray's "Drift Away." (That one gets an extra star for including the original artist in the new recording. It's like having James Garner in the 1994 Maverick movie—props to the source. That's cool.) Hell, I'll even go so far as to admit that I rather enjoyed Lenny Kravitz's cover of "American Woman," originally by the Guess Who (although the strange electronic effects toward the end kind of turned me off on that one after awhile).

I really don't know what the difference is here. I'm not a huge Rod Stewart fan, but he has his moments. (For what it's worth, I really like "Maggie May.") But I can't think of a single cover he's done that actually sounds good. And it seems like that's all he does anymore—pity. And I really like some of Cher's older stuff, though I don't know too very much beyond the Sonny & Cher days (with the exception of "Believe," one of my all-time favorite guilty pleasure songs). But she really has no business singing doo-wop (or "shoop shoop," as the case may be). I think the common theme among the songs I listed as "acceptable" is that they managed to bring something new and fresh to the song, while still maintaining its original feel. Beyond that though, I can't really explain what it is that makes a good cover. It's like porn: I can't define it, but I know it when I see it. Or hear it, in this case.

But yeah, in conclusion, I think a hostile takeover of the caf radio is in order here. But then again, it could be worse; they could be playing Batesville-style country.